Something that we see many people struggle with on their health journey is that they are clutching so hard onto this version of themselves — the one before they start — that they cannot fully commit to the journey to becoming a new version of themselves. Everything they do is simply a diet — a temporary way of eating to shed some pounds.
So I want to ask you today, are you keeping a death grip on the past version of yourself? Or are you willing to let go and embrace the person you are becoming?
Letting go of the past
Letting go of the past, or the way that you have always done things, feels hard. Your past is filled with memories, emotions, and attachments. However, dwelling on the past keeps you stuck in a never-ending cycle, preventing you from moving forward and becoming MORE. Holding on to the past will only allow a certain amount of growth and prevent you from reaching your full potential.
Many of us see a little bit of growth, then hit a snag or stall out. We chalk it up to, “Well, this is just who I am. This is how I do things. I guess this is as far as I will be able to go.” We end up settling or going back to the old version because continuing to push forward will require us to make more changes than we want to.
Redefining yourself
Today, I want you to question the narrative of “This is who I am and how I do things.” This is NOT “just who you are.”
Instead, say, “This is who I am so far. But I’m not dead yet, so my growth isn’t done yet.” I’m still growing, still changing, still learning. I like many things about this version of me, but I don’t like all of them, and I’m not stopping until I become who I can be. It will not be overnight, but I know that it can be done. I will have patience with myself as I continue to navigate these new roads. I will be patient because I know that I have the power to change into what I can be.”
The reality of change
To make true and lasting change, you have to be perfect. Just kidding. This is not the way to true and lasting change.
If you want to make real changes, you are going to have to get the voice right in your head. You spend more time listening to yourself than anyone else. You have to make your thoughts work with you and for you. This takes time. It takes patience. And you certainly aren’t going to get it perfect all the time.
We are all a work in progress. And we do most of that work in our minds. It’s constant work, forever. You will never arrive there. You are never going to not be working on your mindset. I have to work on mine every day.
Embracing imperfection
Sometimes I am glad to be me. I am proud to be me. Other times, I am scared or embarrassed to be me. But I know that me is all I’ve got. Maybe I am not who I want to be yet, maybe I mess up way more than I would like to, but I am never going to give up. I am never going to just shrug and say, “Well, I am who I am, so that’s just what I do.” I am determined to keep revamping and remodeling my inner self, so that I can work on my actions, my words, my impact. It’s a choice. I have to constantly decide to be a more mature, more self-aware version of me. Even when my mood is volatile and my emotions run high. Even when I fall short. I will continue to work. I will strive to be better.
Ephesians 4:22-24: Throw off your old sinful nature and your former way of life, which is corrupted by lust and deception. Instead, let the Spirit renew your thoughts and attitudes. Put on your new nature, created to be like God—truly righteous and holy.
This makes it sound as easy as changing your clothes. But we all know it’s not that easy. It’s simple, but it’s not easy. Old habits die hard.
The process of transformation
You have to work at it and embrace the process. The point is not instant perfection; it is constant progress. Real transformation comes from making countless, small, right choices that align with who you are and who you want to be long-term—the new version of you, not the old one.
The way to do this is by reframing and retraining your mind to react differently. As you change, the world around you will continue to be the same one that it always has been. The neural pathways that are carved out from our long-term habitual behavior are deeply grooved and tied to that world. It is our job to create new neural pathways to our new world, so that you can deepen those grooves and create a new version of you.
When things are deeply ingrained in us, there will be slip-ups. You will make mistakes. But you cannot respond to these the same way that you always have. By throwing in the towel. You need to rework the way that you respond to yourself when these things happen. Rewire your reaction. Retrain the way that you talk to yourself afterward.
You need a new conversation in your head—a new language altogether.
Mindset concepts
I have six mindset concepts to keep on hand as you continue to make positive, forward movement in your life. I want you to write these down and use them often. Each phrase also comes with an action step. Today we are going to cover the first two. This will be a three-week series.
1. I’m not stuck unless I stop. Action step: Commit to progress.
If you want to be successful at anything, making a commitment to progress is not negotiable. Without this commitment, you are already defeated before you even start. There are going to be challenges and obstacles along the way, but you cannot live in denial or surrender to disappointment. You are going to have to approach these challenges with determination and resilience. Most importantly, you have to be ready to face them head-on and not hide from them. You have to be willing to take them on and move through the challenges. That’s how you become a different version of yourself.
2. I Am Enough. Action step: Accept yourself.
Why am I telling you that you are enough? Because our brains have this natural tendency to look for what’s wrong. When we start talking about self-awareness and personal responsibility, there is this fine line between being able to see yourself fully—your strengths and weaknesses—and using this information to help you move forward, and thinking, “I have all of these weaknesses…I’m not cut out for this…I’m not capable of this.”
Recognizing your value
We all have an inner critic. That voice of self-doubt and negativity can make you your own worst enemy if you aren’t careful. We want to turn our inner critic into someone who gives constructive criticism from a wise place. We want to be people that can acknowledge that we don’t always know everything or get everything right, but there is a healthy way to do that. You can train this voice to be wise and loving.
You are already enough, flaws and all. What I am not saying is that you are already enough—stay as you are. I don’t think we should ever have that attitude. I am saying that you are already enough and can access your strengths to move forward. You are already smart enough, savvy enough, strong enough, resilient enough, brave enough to continue to improve yourself. You have many strengths that you can use to improve any weakness or blind spot that you have. It is okay to not have it all together and notice there is room for improvement, but you have to remember that you are always more than what you are missing. Do not turn your lack into your label.
This is the quickest way to make sure that you stop, and remember we are not stuck unless we stop. We all make mistakes and have weaknesses, but instead of running from yourself, you can accept yourself. You are not broken and beyond repair. You can improve and work toward a better result in areas that you need to improve, but you will not do that if you do not know your value and that you are capable of it.
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